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I'll be so disappointed if I'm carrying another boy

Posts: 3

Joined 12-Apr-12

10-May-12 12:21 pm

I already have two boys. I have my ultrasound in a few weeks (16 weeks atm) and I'm dreading being told its a boy.

This will be our last child so there are no more dreams after this.

Since everyone has found out about my pregnancy, my family and close friends have been saying 'Oh I hope it's a girl!'. My mother in law has said it, my sis in laws, my mum. Even my husband really wants a girl this time. It's like if it's a boy, I'm letting everyone down and disappointing myself.

Everyone in my family have mixed families and I feel so hard done by. My sister and my 2 brothers all have daughters and sons. My friends have one of each. Ever since I was young I'd only ever wanted girls so each time I was told I was having a boy, I was very disappointed.

This pregnancy feels different. I've been slightly more sick, I've gone off chocolate and coffee which I didn't do with my other pregnancies so although I know it's not always the case, I'm hopeful that its because this one is a girl.

I really don't know how I'm going to deal with it if it's a boy. Even from now, I'm dreading the scan but wishing it would come quickly too.

I just wanted to write this down as I'm sure people here will understand my feelings.

 

Posts: 335

Joined 21-Jun-11

Top Poster
10-May-12 12:46 pm
So sorry to hear that you are stressing over it. Do you have a 12 week nub shot you could post in the meantime? We are expecting our third boy any day now. I was so shocked to hear boy at 15 some weeks. I was fully expecting to hear girl. We had swayed and all my symptoms were different. I just couldn't accept the fact that it was indeed a boy. Since we didn't get a print out I spent 5 weeks obsessing on how it could be wrong. When I saw our third boy in all his glory at 21 weeks I definitely felt better and was able to not be as upset. Don't get me wrong I am super confused. We wanted 3 kids and that was it.. and I thought one would be a girl... now I am wondering if we should go for a fourth. But I am so terrified of 4 boys! I think that finding out ahead of time is a good idea. It will give you time to process all your feelings if you do hear boy. I hope you hear girl! I have now met 3 people who their third was a girl after 2 boys.. of course these people did not plan on getting pregnant.. argh. But, I have also met a few having their third boy.. I guess it's just a crap shoot. Know that no matter what you hear and what you have you will love your baby and time will heal your feelings. GL!!!!

Posts: 254

Joined 23-Nov-10

11-May-12 10:39 am
This was my story about 2 1/2 years ago! My husband and I wanted 3 or 4 kids, but we wanted all girls. I was disappointed every time I found out I was having a boy, but I was devastated to find out #3 was a boy! I always said I wouldn't try for #4 without a guarantee that I would have a girl, but we didn't have the money for high-tech to ensure a girl and I will be 36 in a few months. After looking around at everyone I knew, including family, I realized that I didn't know anyone who had 3 or 4 kids that were all the same gender. We decided that maybe we would get our little girl like everyone else if we just tried one more time. So, we thought hard about it prayed about it, and we really felt God was telling us to have one more and we would finally get our girl. Well, needless to say I found out at 16 weeks that this is boy #4! I feel so cheated! To me, having a daughter was something I needed! That being said, I love my boys to pieces and I am not actually upset this baby is a boy. I am just devastated that I will NEVER have a girl because we are done! Four kids was our limit, and we really don't feel we could handle any more. Sorry I am not providing any words of wisdom here, I just wanted to make sure you know you are not alone in how you feel. I truly hope you are having a girl this time, as I would not wish these feelings on anyone! Good Luck!

Baby Bear Boy2002 Baby Bear Boy2005 Heartbroken2008 Baby Bear Boy2010 Baby Bear Boy2012 I love my boys so much, but I just don't know how to ever feel complete without a daughterBaby Bear Girl, too!

Posts: 1,896

Joined 9-Jul-08

Top Poster
11-May-12 3:34 pm

hope1212:
I was fully expecting to hear girl.
 

Me too (DS3). I really felt he was a girl, esp since I had strong girl feelings early on, and his nub got many girl guesses (11w nub shot got all girl guesses, 12w got 50/50 but one tech guessed girl). I wouldn't trade him now, but wow that was so upsetting at his u/s 2 years ago!

I'm not afraid of 4 boys, I'm afraid of never getting a girl and thus never getting over this damn GD! Sad

OP- hope you hear girl!

Baby Bear Boy '06 Baby Bear Boy '09 Baby Bear Boy '11

I'm in no way "disappointed" that I have sons, I just want the chance to raise a daughter as well. Happy Wink

Want to try for a Baby Bear Girl early next year! Pray

formerly Saggyrl11

Posts: 224

Joined 5-Feb-12

12-May-12 3:19 am
Good luck with your u/s. xx

 

Readyforbaby3

Posts: 959

Joined 28-Dec-10

Top Poster
12-May-12 8:55 pm

 Maybe you should just tell yourself it's a boy and already think of it as a boy.  That way, when you go for you u/s you will already be expecting a boy and if you hear boy you won't be shocked.  And if it's a girl, it's a pleasant surprise!

Baby Bear Boy  2007 Baby Bear Boy 2010 Baby Bear Girl 2013

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