Big hugs hon, you're still in what I call the grieving for a dream stage- be gentle to yourself.
As far as boys and their mums, my DH is very close to both his parents. My in laws are wonderful grandparents, and wonderful people. In the past when I've had a problem or needed advice I would go to my M-I-L first, rather than my own mother (who has since died), because my MIL is so understanding while my own mother was reserved and often judgemental. If you have a strong, caring relationship with your sons, that will continue in the future.