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7 weeks left and I can't get over GD!!

Posts: 7

Joined 18-Dec-11

18-Apr-12 11:58 am

 I know how you feel. My first post here was months ago when I found out we're most likely having a boy and the reactions of family that just floored me. I doubt I'd be as depressed about it if people were happy, but I haven't gotten ONE congratulations from ANYONE, just comments that are rude and cruel. "Oh, you'll have a handful!" "You should start getting into sports now!" "Boys are rambunctious brats. Have fun with that!" From a girl from my alma mater: "It sucks you can't be a part of our girl club! I'm sorry you're having a boy, that's horrible!" My brother-in-law's wife just had a girl and everyone's freaking out over it, as they never have girls in their family. That girl is spoiled rotten. Everyone says how much they love and adore her and are like, "Too bad our other grandchild is a boy, we won't love him as much." I'm being treated like a second class citizen by them and my husband is not defending me at all. I am not making this crap up! She had FIVE baby showers. I had ZERO, because it's a boy.

 My mom tells me, "You wanted a girl, so obviously you'd get a boy. You never get what you want. Get over it and be happy for everyone having girls, just live vicariously through them and buy them clothes." I know about 15 people who are pregnant and I am the ONLY ONE having a boy. I don't even know anyone who has a boy if they have kids already, everyone has girls. I hope I can get over it by the time the baby comes but I doubt it. Shopping breaks my heart so we don't have anything except for a few onesies. I did buy some really goofy hats the other day to try and cheer me up but it didn't work. We didn't have a baby shower, because no one would come and no one wanted to plan one, all because of the baby being a boy. Then I feel guilty because I know people who are struggling to concieve and this was a total accident and I'm still reeling about how all the things I wanted to do with my life are no longer possible. I always thought I'd be one and done, especially now because we didn't plan on having children yet (I was going to start graduate school this fall and had to withdraw). I am overwhelmed with the whole parenting thing, terrified of it, angry about it, and having a boy just makes it worse when I always wanted a girl because I want that mother/daughter bond I never had with my own mother. I keep praying the ultrasound prediction was wrong, as my OB thought girl at first and said she still has no true idea because the supposed penis was obviously the cord, the 20 week scan said boy but it's not really anything that prominent if you look at the pictures, because this baby is not cooperative, won't open their legs, and is super lazy! Logically I know I should be happy but...I just can't. I've been to psychiatrists, therapists, etc for the depression (not just rooted in the baby being a boy, it's everything else too) and they just tell me to get over it even though I have a history of depression and am terrified of PPD.

Always saw myself with a daughter, ever since I was a kid. I never even thought about having a boy, I just knew in my heart this was a girl and looks like I'm wrong. Gah. It sucks being so sad about this and feeling so bad about being sad. My husband wanted a boy really badly, of course. I just hope he turns out a little nerd like his dad and isn't into sports, trucks, etc or any of that garbage...

Baby Bear Boy 5-2012