My sister is a Behavioral Therapist and has worked in the system with special needs children for over a decade if not more. She has chosen to take two autistic boys as foster children. One of which could not even eat with silverware when he first came to live with her. He is now 23 and thriving. He's been there since 9, but what a gentleman he has grown to be. She doesn't get paid much for being a foster mom and she utilizes every service she can for him, but she specializes in this too. The other child who is older has other disorders that complicate treating him, but she's sticking with it. Its just amazing her motivation and the great strides those children have made.
I worry about my DS #3. He seems a little wild,but he is emotional and will look me in the eyes. He is truely a sweetie with or without problems.
Autism is real and there is real FREE help out there. There are people who want to help and enjoy these children and will help you learn how to deal with them and love them too.
Sometimes just cuddling and spending time with your child, even if you don't think you want too, will help. The feelings will follow. I think that if I hadn't cuddled and squished my littlest one with love, it would be very tough right now. He is snoozing on my arm as I'm writing this.
Its really wierd, my GD comes and goes, its mild at the moment. Thank God. I wish I just didn't care about gender whatsoever.
My DS #1 is just like yours OP. I promise it gets better, I thought my son was wierd too, and he is, but in a good way. He does have trouble learning, following directions, ect..., but he's smarter then I ever thought he'd be. He is in normal classes and the teachers agree that he's very smart, they call him the absent minded professor. He needs to get his head screwed on right. lol. Your son may grow up and find the cure to cancer or somthing else, maybe even autism. 
Just go with the flow, his flow. Who cares what the other mom's kids are doing and what color their little bundle is, pink or blue. Your son is number 1 and it will be ok. You go for the help you need and take advantage of the free stuff. Most importantly don't let anyone put your baby down.