question for all you debaters

Actually, I typically don't like to argue/debate.  However, there have been posts where I have added my mainly because I felt it was needed, or I felt I had a good point of view to offer.

because im bored and i feel that i have some good input to a debate but i do not/ try not to offend people....its just myopinion of some subjects

nickilee:

Sarah:

there have been posts where I have added my

 

I have on a couple threads too, but I wouldn't continue to argue after that, mainly because I know my own temper and when I argue I get really upset and it ruins my whole day.

I guess I have really tough skin.  I was made fun of and called plenty of racial names as a kid, so much doesn't bother me; i think I've gained immunity to most things.

nickilee:

 It just doesn't seem fun to me to continue arguing the same subject because most of the time your not going to change someones mind.

I agree.  It's not fun for me either.  What is most bothersome to me, though, is when some get extremely sensitve to things said and take things personally, when it was never intended to be taken in such a manner.  Other than that, I can handle "attacks", lol!

I love to debate, but I find that debates often go off subject, or we can't really communicate properly on the forum (as we could if we were face to face).  

I try to avoid coming on here, because sometimes debates can become offensive - or because I think people are so wrong, but don't want to upset or offend!!

Krissymum:

I have started to feel a bit "harrassed" since I joined the forum here and got singled out. Women can be cruel
to each other that is for sure!

I think you're lovely KM

But I agree, sometimes (recently if you've been following a certain debate) I've felt totally singled out - and I really feel that people didn't read my arguements at all, especially in context with the theme of the debate.

Water under the bridge..but it doesn't make me want to participate.

Alice

nickilee:

Just an example. It reminds me of when the "imposters" came here and started a bunch of crap and I wanted to reach through the screen and choke those hags.

Most people know how to argue and don't know how to debate so feelings are going to get hurt.  That is why most of the debates on this forum end in someone getting hurt instead of it being a true debate.  There is always going to be someone that has to throw in a quick jab here and there and eventually someone is going to blow up and get offended.  It could be a very easy debate but because someone offended the other person in a different debate they end up carrying those feelings over to somewhere else.

I started a simple thread in the debate forum and wanted to know if people thought the debate forum had segregated IG.  Funny thing is that only a couple actually responded to what the thread was truly about.  They all decided to carry on about the stupid political debate instead of discussing the original post.  That is how feelings get hurt.  Nobody can seem to leave their feelings at one of the debates and move to the next.  JMHO though! 

I debated in high school and college, and have been coaching debate for 8 years.  I love it (although that debate is much different than what happens here -- see example:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yrJdCbHqhGk).

Anyway... I love research and argumentation.  Again, I grant that it often devolves here -- but I believe people need to have a voice and express themselves.  Too often, I feel stay at home moms (which many of us are here) do not have a forum to express their opinions and knowledge.  It's a shame thoughtful women have a limited outlet for their educated analysis.

I don't take it personally, I wish others wouldn't as well, but... things happen.  I do think people are often wrong, but everyone is entitled to a voice.

Not sure if that answers your question.  But I debate!

the subjects are usually more interesting than typical threads but I do find myself in debate sections alot, even on coupon websites...pretty sad! LOL

usually I love hearing others opposite opinions, others times I just get ticked off at people who attack and then play the victim themselves...but there will always be people like that at every message board.

overall i'd say it's entertaining, much more so than changing diapers! 

Michaela:

Most people know how to argue and don't know how to debate so feelings are going to get hurt. 

Maybe we could call it "Argument" instead of "Debate"....just joking...lol.  I think a lot of it is going around in circles also and feelings do get hurt because we are in fact human and our feelings do get hurt sometimes.  It's a lot easier to say something cruel on the computer than it is to someone's face too.  I do like to read the debates and have a good laugh sometimes and then rarely I will type in my opinion and pretty much be done.....because you are right about not changing someone else's mind.

 Not too much of a debator either.But there are so many interesting/cool/weird topics that people discuss on a normal basis in which I always tend to have an opinion on or have an answer to, and it just makes me want to share my viewpoint to others , some even on this site. 

Well it does help me see the other side......usually doesn't change my mind, but helps me gain appreciation and perspective from where they are coming from.  I just wish that:

A. People would stay away from inflammatory words as that is very hurtful.....calling someone racist, or using the words 'beyond contempt'....well just not very productive in a discussion.

B. Just because someone criticizes a particular candidate doesn't mean that they are criticizing those that support him.  I have relatives that voted for Obama and I still love them.

I would say my feelings got very hurt when everyone ganged up on me for posting the article about Obama being a pathological narcissist.  The words used towards me were inappropriate and they were taking it as a personal affront to themselves when the article was directed at Obama.

Same thing with religion...just because I believe with my entire soul that Christianity is the only way, doesn't mean that I don't respect others to have their own opinion on the subject.  I can still think they are wrong and respect them.  My beliefs will not allow me to compromise on thinking it is the only correct path.  Has nothing to do with me having to be right, but more in my faith in the God I believe in.....He has said this is the only way in the Bible, not me.

I will say that I used to be VERY Prochoice, but the debates here did help me move completely to the other side.....those who are Prolife made VERY poignant points and helped me immensely.  I think because I was prochoice at one time, I have a certain amount of sympathy towards those who are faced with a tough decision (such as when pregnant with a baby with a serious birth defect), but with my religious beliefs in place and having read the arguments in favor of prolife, I am now wholeheartedly proflife.