It is driving me insane!!!! I guess I should be thankful that he will ask for a diaper and absolutely never soil his underwear but I am tired of it. He will be 4 in about 4m and he still won´t poop in the potty. I have tried everything. I have bought cheap and expensive toys to bribe him and he will not go. He will simply say he will pass on the toy and take the diaper over sitting on the potty. He is rarely constipated so it isn´t that. I don´t know what else to do. He will be going to preschool this year (he starts like next month) and he has to be potty trained. He does great with pee. He even sleeps in underwear and he won´t pee in a diaper for anything, I found this out a few weeks ago when we were flying to visit my family, he said he needed to pee when we were about to board the plane so I put on a pull up and told him to oee there, 7hrs later the pull up was dry and he sat on the toilet as soon as we walked in my dad´s house and peed a whole lot! Why does he have to be so stubborn??? arghhh

 try reading him this book...."everybody poos" by Taro Gomi

lol....if you click on this youtube link...you can see the book and watch a lady reading the book

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfYh4eKZ_Cg

I taught 2 years olds and potty trained them for years.  I have never ran into a potty issue with any of my kids (watch I just jinxed myself) because I have very strict rules when potty training.

First is you have to be willing to deal with poop in general.  First thing is to stop letting him poop in a diaper.  He is old enough to stop that behavior now.  Here is the long and short of it.  You don't give him the diaper and what happens??  Well, he's gonna have to do it at some point right??  Who cares if it's on the floor or in his underwear.  The main thing is he stops associating pooping with doing it in the diaper.  I actually used to let my kids walk around with no pants on when I train.  When they need to go, they go in the potty.  I have had them poop on my floor too.  When they did that, they cleaned it up.  I helped of course, but they didn't get out of it because they learned it was something that was NOT pleasant.  It is much easier to sit on the potty and just do it.  I think my younger son pooped on the floor once before he realized he didn't want to do that again.  I also let them sit on the potty seat when watching cartoons.  Basically they would sit there for an hour or so and then "something" would happen.  My son was just shocked when he realized he actually pooed in the potty...LOL...it was kinda cute.  I have met many moms who hand their child a pull up or diaper when it's time to poop and I just think it delays the potty training in general. 

mom of 3 princes:

 try reading him this book...."everybody poos" by Taro Gomi

lol....if you click on this youtube link...you can see the book and watch a lady reading the book

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfYh4eKZ_Cg

 

 

We have that book and he loves it. We even talk about it when we go to the zoo but he still won´t go on the potty.

jojogirl,

We are very open about poop, we laugh about it, we talk about it and as nasty as it sounds I let him watch me go poop and he thinks it is such an awesome thing but he still doesn´t go. I have been able to get him in the potty a few times when he is half way done and he gets excited but that is it. 

I only give him a diaper because he simply won´t go anywhere else, not the floor, not his underwear. He will poop in a diaper but he wants it off right away so I have tried making him stay in it for about 1hr so he is uncomfortable and then make him clean himself and nothing. I have tried the I have no diapers for you but he still fits in his brother´s so he will get me those . Doctor says to let him be but I am sick of playing this game. I guess once we are back home (we are visiting my dad in another country) and settled back into our routine I will start withholding the diaper and give him benefiber and mineral oil to make sure his poop doesn´t get hard.

Im having the same problem with my 3.5 yo. He would only poo in is nappy or he would just hold until i gave in and put a nappy on him. Then one day we were at a friends house and he needed to go so I told him he would have to wait until we got home to get a nappy and next thing i know he is on the toilet doing a poo! That went great for about a week until DH took him to the park and he was too afraid to go in the dirty toilets at the park so he pooed his pants. Since then if I refuse him a nappy he just poos his pants and it is driving me nuts!!! I know he can go on the toilet because he has done it before so why wont he just go????? He would rather poo his pant and get into trouble than go on the toilet - I really dont know what to try next, help!

Clarebear:

Im having the same problem with my 3.5 yo. He would only poo in is nappy or he would just hold until i gave in and put a nappy on him. Then one day we were at a friends house and he needed to go so I told him he would have to wait until we got home to get a nappy and next thing i know he is on the toilet doing a poo! That went great for about a week until DH took him to the park and he was too afraid to go in the dirty toilets at the park so he pooed his pants. Since then if I refuse him a nappy he just poos his pants and it is driving me nuts!!! I know he can go on the toilet because he has done it before so why wont he just go????? He would rather poo his pant and get into trouble than go on the toilet - I really dont know what to try next, help!

Why do kids have to be so complicated? All my dh says is well he is not even 4 yet, give him time. I mean the kid has been interested in the potty since he was like 18 months and here I am over 3 yrs later still nothing!!!!

I feel your frustration.  My 3 yr old dd is the exact same way and also very stubborn.  I have no idea how to get her to actually poo in the potty!

OMG! I thought I was the only one!  My nearly 4 year old does the same exact thing...i am so frustrated...nothing works...He is 100% pee trained and dry at night but totally refuses to poop in the potty.  My house looks like a toy store with all the unopened toys i have bought to bribe him...he just does not care...he would rather poop in a diaper than have the toys. When he has to go he puts on his pull up and hides in the bathroom and when he is done he comes out and tells me it is time to change him...then the underware go right back on.   I had to find a different preschool than the one i wanted to send him to because they would not take him unless he was potty trained....I worry about taking away the diapers bc i am pregnant again and dont want him to think i am taking away the diapers for his sister. 

Anyway, the whole point of the post is to let you know, my older son who is almost 6 did the same thing...and then one day out of the blue before he turned 4 he decided it was time...on his terms and he just went and has never looked back...so as upsetting as it is...i think the best thing to do is wait...you dont want to end up having him be constapated-as i always say, no one ends up going away to college not potty trained!  I think the bigger deal we make about it the more they want to do the opposite! 

Good luck to you!  I feel your pain!  I am so sick of buying diapers i can hardly stand it!!!

To give you hope, my son was exactly like this. He was terrified of pooping on the potty. He peed on the potty consistently at 3 years old, but would not poop - only in a diaper. it was so frustrating. As his 4th b-day approached, we talked and talked about how 4 year olds don't use diapers and talked about the "poop party" we were going to have when he did go in the toilet.

The day he turned 4, he finally did it. After lots of crying and lots of fiber rich food and diabetic sugar candy (softens stools), he finally went.

We celebrated like he had won the biggest contest in the world! lol I even made a cake (chocolate of course - gross I know) and bought balloons.

He's now 4-1/2 and he is a pooping champ!  

It will happen, it's so frustrating I know, but it will happen.

I could have written your post!

My boy is almost 4 and stubborn about pooping too.  He's great with peeing for the most part.  He's been in underwear for a few months.  He just poops into the underwear.  I finally found some very motivating toys recently.  He started pooping on the toilet just long enough to get all of those toys.  We bought something else he would love and made a sticker chart (so many poops = getting the big toy, which worked for the pee training), but he won't to it anymore.  He'll poop in his underwear anywhere - restaurants, playgrounds, car, etc.  I felt more patient before because I thought it was a true phobia of doing it on the toilet.  Since he did it for a week and was fine, I know he's just choosing not to!  Now I'm making him clean himself and help rinse out the dirty underwear.  I'm not sure how much that is helping, but at least it's something!  He is definitely making progress, but it's slow.  Even after he was pee trained at home, it took a long time before he'd pee in public bathrooms.  At least that is going well now.

I'm being patient with him, but I am SO tired of dealing with poopy underwear!!!  Especially when we're not home!  I'm sorry so many of you are going through it, but it does make me feel better!  IRL everyone keeps telling me about how early their children trained.  

consider yourself lucky girl! my 3y 4m son won't even look at the potty let alone sit on it.