oh what to do?

Hi anyone reading this would be in a similar position to myself, I have three gorgeous, healthy, at times handful boys! i would not swap one for the world. I also suffered a miscarridge and wonder if that was my girl. Anyway I am now pregnant again, and of course the no. one question for anyone I tell is 'oh i bet you hope it is a girl!', to which i always reply with the standard as long as it is healthy I dont mind (which I do believe). My husband only wanted two children and I feel lucky that he has changed his mind and blessed me with four and an angel baby, we have discussed and decided that this will be our last child and that when I have to have my c-section I will have my tubes tied. We have had our scans and didnt want to find out what the baby was, have the last one a suprise however since having the scan I have become obssessed with finding out any clues from our ultrasound pics, it is consuming my time. Has this happened to anyone else?

 

I get so sick of comments already mentioned on here from people, I have so many standard responses now for gender assumptions my list is growing. I would love to have a little girl so I can talk to her about the world from a girls point of view, to give her opportunities I never felt I had, and to plan a wedding, etc etc. I know I can do all of this with my boys however I find it hard to swallow when everyone around me has a mixed sex family. Any tips to get over?

 

thanks

Sorry people are being annoying. I sometimes think their reactions and questions make gender desire 10000000x worse (it does for me anyway!).
I think with this pregnancy we're taking the approach of only telling close family because I can't deal with the "you/your husband muct be desperate for a boy!".

I think in your position, I would prepare myself and assume that I was having another boy. That way you won't be disappointed.

x

oooooheeeer:

Sorry people are being annoying. I sometimes think their reactions and questions make gender desire 10000000x worse (it does for me anyway!).
I think with this pregnancy we're taking the approach of only telling close family because I can't deal with the "you/your husband muct be desperate for a boy!".

I think in your position, I would prepare myself and assume that I was having another boy. That way you won't be disappointed.

x

 

I totally agree with the above, other people's comments definitely make things worse and they make me so mad. I'm always VERY careful with what I say to people now!! I also got lots of those comments when I was pregnant with number 3 and I usually shrugged and said 'a girl would be nice but a boy would be fine too, boys are a great!' or something like that, if I denied outright I wanted a girl I was met with incredulous looks so I figured I may as well be a little truthful! Amazingly I'm STILL getting those kind of comments!!

I also agree to just assume your baby is a boy, if you mentally prepare for it to be so then a girl will be a wonderful surprise but hopefully hearing boy won't be too much of a disappointment. I think we all carry that flame of hope inside us and it's almost impossible to put it out but I did such a good job of convincing myself number 3 was a boy I was almost numb with shock when they showed me my DD! It felt like they'd swapped my boy and the girl they gave me wasn't really mine, it took a few days to really bond with her but obviously I love her to bits now.

Good luck xx xx 

 

Hi! I'm sorry about you're miscarriage.I'm in a similar situation. I have two boys and im pregnant for the third and last time. While I personally would love a boy or girl. I go back and forth on what I would like, which is crazy because its decided already! the comments that people (mother-in-law especially) say can really grate on my nerves. Also I never found out the sex of my two oldest and I didn't again with this one, thinking it would be a walk in the park, i mean ive done it twice before right?....Wrong!! I don't know if its because this is my last time but its driving me crazy that I don't know what this baby is. I even posted a picture and a video on here(neither of which have gender clues!) and i've contemplated putting my other pictures and video's but i'm not sure if i would be disapointed in myself if i did find out the gender. I think part of my frustration is that if I knew for Sure what this baby is I could go out and buy a few special things just for this baby, my very last one. And I have bought some green/white stuff but I really want to buy Pink or Blue! And i refuse to spend money on a elective scan because it seems like a waste of money that could be better spent elsewhere.

I dunno what to say about the mixed gender families except, my mom has two daughters and neither of us is very girly. Neither of us plan on marrying(my brother did). I have kids, my sister is planning on not having any ever. And i would say while im very close to my mom and shes great with my kids...my brother and her get along the most out of the three of us kids. I do hope you get your girl though :) and if you don't four of a kind sounds really cute! I can't help but picture all four in matching christmas jammies(i do that to my boys every year!!)

Feeling good today one of my boy gender disliking relatives (who only has a girl), constantly turns their nose up and says eew at a lot of the what i would consider 'normal' things children do. Anyway her little girl has come of age and is again what i would consider a normal child into everything racing around picking up gross things off the ground exploring, and my relative is having to cope with this! I dont say or comment but needed to say this somewhere and so ingender it is! i just feel like with childrens behaviour at toddler age it shouldnt be judged and gender should not be judged ethier so this just proves to me my theory.

 

hope anyone reading this with girls or boys can have an awesome day with their children and delight in their excitement as they explore the world

I'm not so sure that accepting its a boy now will make you feel less disappointed. I thought I had done that before my 20wk scan. My pregnancies were very similar and I told everone I thought it was another boy. However I still felt completely gutted when I was told and have had a hard time coming to terms with it, harder than I thought I would. I realised that trying reverse psychology Just didn't work, I wanted a girl and that was that. I never really believed I was having one but that didn't make finding out any easier. I think if you are determined not to find out for sure before hand just make sure you have people around you who do understand how you are going to feel when your baby is born and if you are really low about the gender, talk to someone and get some help. I really wish you get your little girl. Fingers crossed for you x