For moms of boys who think their son can't be their best friend...

You guys may have heard about Mattie Stepanek, a 13-year-old boy who was a poet and author that passed away from muscular dystrophy a few years ago (http://www.mattieonline.com/). His mom lives about 15 minutes from my house and was in our local paper a few days ago because she is releasing a new book about her son.

I just happened to start reading the article, and one paragraph just made me cry. I thought about all the boy moms on here who assume sons can't be "best friends" with them like daughters can. Here is what Jeni Stepanek (Mattie's mom) wrote:

"He just believed so much in making people laugh," Stepanek said, smiling. She added while people will miss his jokes and poetry, she misses everything about her son. "All of that will be missed by the world, but what I miss is the snuggles, the foot massages, the morning coffee and afternoon tea with my best friend," Stepanek said. "I miss playing anything from Candyland to chess and talking about philosophy, spirituality or something funny that happened when he was with a friend, or him telling me why the latest Austin Powers movie was a 'must-see, five-thumbs-up' event. I miss those private inside moments."

I just thought this was beautiful. :)

How truely sad. I feel for her; that kind of loss is so unfair. No parent should have to watch their child die.

I am best of friends with my DS1; he's special to me in some many ways. Boys or girls...it does not matter. Every child is unique and brings wonderment and true, unconditional love to your life.

 

Awwwe.  I saw him on Oprah.  I was so touched by his story.  He was a very old soul.  Remarkable spirit inside a failing body. 

It was amazing that such a young little boy had such insight and honesty. 

I love that they had such a close relationship. 

My story is not news worthy or particularly unusual/interesting... but my ds is my best friend too.  lol.  He is the first one I want to tell things to and the one that I know will laugh at my stupid3 jokes and the one that always wants to be right with me if I am sad, happy, bored, or well.... anytime.  He is awesome.  :o) 

That was beautiful

That is really nice to hear- that you can have a son as a best friend! On the flip side, I am not close to my mother at all, so there is no guarantee that if I had a daughter, we would be good friends!

I think my boys will remain my best friends

we are really close knit family

Growing up my mum and dad doted on me and my brothers and its paid off because now we are all grown up and have our own kiddies we always still see our mum and dad and at Christmas we have HUGE family get togethers and theres alot of kids in our families haha

So i cant imagine having a child and not feeling like they can be your best friend but i know it happens

Anyway that poem was lovely and so sad and i agree no parent should ever have to bury a child :( :(

Rein&Sonshines:

Boys or girls...it does not matter. Every child is unique and brings wonderment and true, unconditional love to your life.

This is SO true!!! :-)

I totally believe sons can be best friends

My cousin just got married and he made a toast to one person. He said it was the one person who he respected more than anyone , his best friend , his hero, his mom.

Made me cry for sure.

Yep, another big reason that I have overcome my GD after a daughter -

I have so much in common with my oldest son already - we can discuss

all kinds of things and he gives me great advice too, if I ask him about home decorations

or about clothes/ jewellery etc. We have the same taste in things, and he likes

luxury stuff just like his mom do - the other day we talked about his friend at school

who has behavioural problems and how one can help out, he is such a kind and sensitive soul.

It also helps that my close neighbour, who actually has a pigeon pair grown up, always

spend time with her son, but rarely sees her daughter. It proves to me that it is almost

only the personalities that need to "click" and matters less if we are the same gender or not!

That poor poor woman. It would be the worst thing in the world to lose a child...... And as much as I long for a daughter, deep deep down I know that it is a child's personality and soul that we connect with and bond with, not the gender. Superficial stuff like pink dresses and french braids and tea parties are gender based, of course, but I know that what really matters is what's inside, regardless of the packaging.... I am hoping with all my heart that I can raise my boys to love and respect me the way I already love and respect them (even when they bring me worms!).

that's really beautiful, and it really does give me hope.

I really just think as far as being close to your children that it is just not an all or nothing proposition.  I am definitely a girl mom.  I am girly and love princesses and love pink and frills and am all about manicures and highlights. 

That being said, I am closest with my ds.  He is the most awesome little human.  Some of it is that my girls are still very young and while I worship them... they are not yet capable of friendship... and some of it is that my ds really is that special.  I have gone through so much with him.  I just feel really really close to him, like we come from the same place and understand each other. 

I think you can absolutely have a preference for 1 gender and be very very close to a child of the opposite gender.  Being a girl mom comes easier... but my ds is awesome and is worth working for.  If that makes any sense.