Struggling with circumcision decision!!

SSW_Mommy:

Ilovebeingpregnant:

It is my very strong opinion that god made you the way you are and that any change to your sons body that is not medical (to save his life) should be something he decides when he is old enough, in my mind it is mutilation of the sexual organs and I see it on a par with female circumsision which is forced upon young women in other cultures. Its cruel and unnessasary :-( How would you feel is your parents had snipped of part of your vagina at birth?

that's strange, i didn't see where she asked for opinions on whether she should get it done or not...

Its an open forum and I can say what I like, I feel very strongly that you do not own your childs body and should not do anything to it that is not medically needed, people should think about what they are doing to an innocent child, an act that can never be reversed.

Both of my sons are circ'd and although it was very stressful to sit in the waiting room while they took them away (got them done at a week old) it wasn't so bad. We thought it through and weighed pros and cons. We actually knew a few men that got in done as adults because they had so many issues being uncirc'd. That really pushed us over the edge to make the decision. In Ontario Canada it cost us $450 per child which be pretty $$$$. They took the baby, gave a topical analgesic to the area, and was given tylenol. He was gone for about 15 mins and came back to get comforted. I found that hardest part the first few days of diaper changes...but once it's healed (a week) it's no biggie at all. I don't know, it's obviously a personal decision, but I doubt there are any men out there that wished they weren't done. Most women prefer it (at least I think so).

LTB-JAY:

I doubt there are any men out there that wished they weren't done. Most women prefer it (at least I think so).

you must be in the us, its not common here: food for thought, and there is plenty more of it: http://community.babycenter.com/post/a8763705/trigger__my_sons_circumcision_horror_story.

Hi. I noticed this article and thought I would pop in to help. I am not going to preach but I am going to leave an article that explains the facts and myths. It will only take a few minutes to read. Circumcision is so permanent and can't be reversed so I am sure your future son would really thank you if you read through it. :) http://www.nocircpa.org/4642.html

we did our sons. my hubby wasn't fond of the idea but he is circumcised. so i told them to go ahead and do it but they asked me if i wanted to hold his hand while they did it. i didn't realise what all it involved so i thought i was being a good mommy when i said yes... omg it was brutal. he didn't cry at all but i sure did. he's a week old and all healed up but my advice is "DON'T WATCH!"

We haven't had our three boys done and won't be either unless medically necessary. I'm in England where it's not the done thing at all. TBH I find it pretty awful as do most people I know and I have no idea why on earth you would agree to have part of your son's body cut off for no reason. Sorry I know you didn't ask for opinions but maybe you should let your son decide whether he wants it done or not when he's older.

No, you're right. I didn't ask for opinions. I asked for ladies who have had their sons done about their experiences. I never asked for your opinion on why I should or shouldn't do it.

Alyx:

We haven't had our three boys done and won't be either unless medically necessary. I'm in England where it's not the done thing at all. TBH I find it pretty awful as do most people I know and I have no idea why on earth you would agree to have part of your son's body cut off for no reason. Sorry I know you didn't ask for opinions but maybe you should let your son decide whether he wants it done or not when he's older.

Alyx same here..I hear on the radio the other day that they are looking at making circumcision for reasons other than medical necessity, illegal in the UK on the grounds of grievous bodily harm.. I don't think it's possible to actually do a thread like this and not get people's opinions. Especially those of us that have grown up in countries that view it as barbaric as female circumcision is perceived elsewhere.

I have also done a lot of research on this. I found this video particularly helpful. It really debunks a lot of the myths surrounding circumcision. I made the decision to not circ my second son. It truly is 100% a cosmetic procedure. I personally didn't want to do that to another one of my boys. I don't see a point in it. The video is long but well worth the time if you are making such an important decision :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ceht-3xu84I&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Ruby_red:

Alyx:

We haven't had our three boys done and won't be either unless medically necessary. I'm in England where it's not the done thing at all. TBH I find it pretty awful as do most people I know and I have no idea why on earth you would agree to have part of your son's body cut off for no reason. Sorry I know you didn't ask for opinions but maybe you should let your son decide whether he wants it done or not when he's older.

Alyx same here..I hear on the radio the other day that they are looking at making circumcision for reasons other than medical necessity, illegal in the UK on the grounds of grievous bodily harm.. I don't think it's possible to actually do a thread like this and not get people's opinions. Especially those of us that have grown up in countries that view it as barbaric as female circumcision is perceived elsewhere.

 I understand that everyone is entitled to an opinion, but I was asking for experiences from boy mums who have circumcised their sons. I know that people don't agree with it and thats fine.

wow ladies, its her baby and her decision. don't listen to them princess this is something you and your partner need to decide on. its not like she's asking, "gee should i leave this baby in a garbage can so i can score some crack?"

   like i said. we did it, i just made the mistake of watching it. but no my son never cried and he was all healed in 2 or 3 days. they did it at the hospital right before they let us go home. and he was fine. im not sure how it works overseas but make sure your insurance will cover it. ours did thank goodness or it was 300 bucks here. also make sure your peditrician will do it, there are a few doctors here ( males) who won't do it but our doctor is female and she does do it. she was also very sweet to answer all my questions.  but its a very personal decision with pros and cons. if the other ladies disagree thats fine, nobody says you have to. im glad we did it, its pretty common here in america and now he will look like everyone else in the locker room.

p.s. congrats on your baby boy!

 When I had my 1st ds - I didnt want to but his dad was done and made a valid point- what if he needs it done when he is older- what will he remember when he is a baby por 12/18/20/30/40 etctera and cant walk for a week.. so we got him done.  when we had our other 2 boys- my dh is done and so we got my other 2 done too- I watched all three of my children get done - and its not too bad- is it painful - obviously.  My reasoning for watching was it was my duty as a parent to comfort my child.  If I had another boy- I would do it again.  I know for every person for it - there is just as many against it.  Many of my friends or family that gave me slack - it ended up that they in the future their children had to get it done.  my BFF- her 2nd son - wasnt done at birth and ended up withy many infectiosn he is/was 2.5 YO and had to just get it done and had to be put under... 

 

This has been my experience.  One thing is your dh will be around your son and youw nat them to "look the same".  I am happy with my decison to do my 3 sons. (plus in Canada it is not covered by hhealthacre it is an out of pocket epxense)  I paid $100 st child $200 2nd and $300 3rd child as every time it goes up - as with inflation. 

 

Anothe rthing you mentioned, you dont know where to go?  mention it to your dr OBGYN - they should know or ask your pediatrician, usually urologists, OBGYNS or gP's do it.  

 

Good luck with your decision.  

I wonder what people actually think uncircumcised men look like??? They'll all look the same in the locker room. It actually shocks me that just because it is common you don't understand it is unnecessary, you are mutilising your child for cosmetic reasons only...maybe if you have a heavy child at birth you could book in a tummy tuck...you realise that's effectively what you're doing - unnecessary surgery. And just because a baby doesn't cry, Jesus the trauma for me is even worse when they don't cry. I think I'm going to have take a step back from this forum...times like this you realise that the English language is what we have in common and culturally we are so different. Good luck with your decision, realistically it's not going to make a difference to your son either way, he will be fine regardless and I know you are just doing what is best for him.

Ruby_red:

I wonder what people actually think uncircumcised men look like??? They'll all look the same in the locker room. It actually shocks me that just because it is common you don't understand it is unnecessary, you are mutilising your child for cosmetic reasons only...maybe if you have a heavy child at birth you could book in a tummy tuck...you realise that's effectively what you're doing - unnecessary surgery. And just because a baby doesn't cry, Jesus the trauma for me is even worse when they don't cry. I think I'm going to have take a step back from this forum...times like this you realise that the English language is what we have in common and culturally we are so different. Good luck with your decision, realistically it's not going to make a difference to your son either way, he will be fine regardless and I know you are just doing what is best for him.

I'm a little confused here. Didn't you say in an earlier post that you will probably circumcise your sons before they are 10? Isn't that still "mutilating your child for cosmetic reasons only" whether it be at birth or 10? Sorry if I misunderstood what you were saying.

It's for medical reasons based on my husbands side...I don't know the medical term for it but all the men from the last 3 generations of his family have needed it done by around that age. Because of this is did ask about getting it done at birth - I do get the point about it being easier done then, than in later life and that was my reason but I was told that unless it needed to medically be done at birth then I would have to wait until the boys were old enough to safely go under general anaesthetic, as they will not do it with a local anaesthetic, which is over 1 from a risk factor point of view...I keep putting that off though as I don't like the thought of an op but to be honest, I can see with ds2 that he will definitely need it done. Sorry to wade into our thread all high and mighty, I know it is definitely a cultural thing, it's just one I don't understand...in the same way as female circumcision.