I know someone who is putting baby up for adoption because it's a boy.

My husband's sister has a step-daughter and the step-daughter has a son. She got pregnant again before her son's first birthday. We were at a family gathering when most of the family found out she's pregnant. After most everyone had left our gathering, a few of us were talking to my husband's mom. She told us that this girl told her and her stepmom that if the baby is a boy that she would be giving the baby up for adoption and if a girl she would keep the baby. Well, she found out a few weeks ago that it's another boy and this morning on fb she posted that she has decided to give the baby up for adoption. My heart sank! I know it would be best for the baby because she already had her mind made up and she's a young mom already having trouble raising the one child she has. This baby will be very loved and well taken care of. I guess what bothers me is that I know the real reason that she's giving the baby up. It makes me sad. I think I'm also struggling a little because I just had a hysterectomy 13 days ago. My uterus is gone; I will never have a chance to have another baby, and after 4 boys I will never have a chance at having a daughter. Before my hysterectomy I felt done having kids. I don't regret having my hysterectomy and being done; I personally don't think I could ever start over because starting over with my 4th child has been hard on me and my family does feel complete. It's just sad. The uterus that I carried all of my babies in is gone, just tossed in the trash.

:(

What is she going to do if each time she ends up pregnant with a boy? just give each of them away?

thats really sad :(

sorry about how you are feeling :(

That's so sad. Can't imagine giving up my own child, but am sure she is doing what she thinks is best for her baby and her first child. Although I can't identify with her decision, I can try to understand it. There are so many people desperate for a child, and he will be much loved in a family that really wants him.

 Wow.  I am at a loss for words.  So sad :(

 

I pray this little boy ends up with the best family ever & that he has a wonderful life.  

 

I just wonder how she will feel when this baby is born, if she will change her mind or not.  Please keep us updated, if you don't mind.

I wonder what his brother will think of this when he's older and finds out! Good chance he will never forgive his mother for giving his brother away only because he was a boy!

Those are exactly my thoughts. Everyone who has replied to her fb post is saying how great it is and what a great mom she is and how selfless she is for giving the gift of life. It will be an open adoption and she knows the couple that will be adopting her son. All of those things would be true if she weren't doing this for such a selfish reason. Everyone doesn't know her reason for this though. It seems totally selfish to me. But selfish or not, I do think it's the best thing for this baby.

This story is truely disturbing.

 That is very awful and selfish of her!  There are some good reasons to give a baby up for adoption but the gender is NOT one of them.   I maybe understand since she's a young mom struggling if she was going to adopt it out either way.  But if this is the only reason than that is just sad.

wildwooddays:

 That is very awful and selfish of her!  There are some good reasons to give a baby up for adoption but the gender is NOT one of them.   I maybe understand since she's a young mom struggling if she was going to adopt it out either way.  But if this is the only reason than that is just sad.

 

 

My thoughts exactly. This mom says she's not ready for another child and feels its best to give it up, yet she says she will keep it if it's a girl as if it's some kind of magical solution to make her life better. How is that possible? Boy or girl, if she thinks she cannot handle more than one child now, either way she's going to be stressed. I can understand it for only that reason, but genderwise....realllllyy?!

 

Wow.  I'm so sick of the boy hate. I love my new son to death....I can't imagine life without him.  I hope she doesn't regret her decision in the future.

MyLilSweetPeas:

Those are exactly my thoughts. Everyone who has replied to her fb post is saying how great it is and what a great mom she is and how selfless she is for giving the gift of life. It will be an open adoption and she knows the couple that will be adopting her son. All of those things would be true if she weren't doing this for such a selfish reason. Everyone doesn't know her reason for this though. It seems totally selfish to me. But selfish or not, I do think it's the best thing for this baby.

 

 

And this is one of the reasons people on fb really get on my nerves.  People are so fake!  They post stupid crap and I guess they forget about all the people on their friend list who know the truth!  

I really wish I could call some people out, but unfortunately, they are family so I should probably keep my mouth shut. 

 

I agree with you, though, this is probably best for her baby.  And like another pp said, what did she think that a baby girl would magically create a better environment for her to keep her child?  

I really felt like asking her if she's going to get her tubes tied. And I also wonder what she's going to do if she gets pregnant again...keep giving up the babies until she gets a girl?

MyLilSweetPeas:

I really felt like asking her if she's going to get her tubes tied. And I also wonder what she's going to do if she gets pregnant again...keep giving up the babies until she gets a girl?

 

 

Yeah, really.  How is she going to explain that one!  

 

This is why I always say, just don't have children unless you're ready to accept whatever they come to you as or with: boy, girl, twins, triplets, disabled, sick, healthy.  There are no guarantees.  Just look at baby Rowan's story.  

 

Our foster care system is full of children abandoned by their parents because of disabilities they were born with.  It's just a sad.  

This is so sad. I was just thinking of Rowan too, this woman needs to realize that a healthy baby is all that matters. So disgusting really....

What a selfish mother. She can obviously look after another child but is going to give away her sons brother`!!!!!