I am so fed up right now. I've been dealing with EGD alone (apart from posting on here) for the last 4 weeks since I got told boy at my 13 week 5 day scan. Admittedly I handled things all wrong with my husband, and he was really angry with me for feeling this way but I have been REALLY trying and genuinely coming to terms with things. I've bought a few baby things which made me feel better, I have been having positive chats with my daughter (who really wants a sister) and explaining that the only thing that matters is that the baby is healthy etc. etc I haven't mentioned one negative thing about it being a boy to my DH since that first day. I had another scan today where it was completely confirmed that it is a boy and I didn't cry and was more interested in the scan than last time where I just wanted to get out of there. DH didn't come with me as he had to work, even though he was working from home today. He didn't come to the last one either. I am still feeling sad about it all but not nearly as bad as I was.......until tonight!
I told my husband it is definately a boy when I came home and was really careful to only show positivity. I told him I was going to tell the kids in the car when I picked them up from school which I did. My dd was a little disappointed but generally ok. I asked them to come up with names and shared with them one name that myself and my husband like (but we definately hadn't chosen a name yet!) DD said she didn't like that name and SS came up with a name he liked. So, we are sat down, kids are in bed, my husband eating a home-cooked meal, watching tv and generally chatting. I told him about the conversation with the kids and he hit the roof. Brought up everything about the first day when I found out, accused me of making all the decisions - said he had already bonded with the one name we have both liked so far, shouted about everything being about me and my daughter....I mean, WTF!!! Apparently now he didn't want to know the gender prior to birth even though I had told him previously that I really wanted to do this because if it were a boy I thought more time would help me come to terms with things. He didn't want to tell anyone the sex even if we knew. Didn't want to discuss names with the children as that is our decision alone - yeah ok, I didn't say I was going to pick or disregard a name because they chose it but wanted to involve them in the process! Ranted at my daughter because she didn't like the name he loves (she's 7 ffs!)
So now, I feel right back to square one. He always does this, I feel like he railroads me emotionally and bullies me by creating arguments all the time out of nothing!!! I don't only have GD now, I wish I weren't having a baby with him at all. He doesn't even look after the kids he has got. The two boys are my step-sons but he only sees them for about half an hour a day, was away with work all last week, going away tomorrow for another week. The first two years I spent with him he was away monday to friday every week, I had never spent more than a day with his boys before that! All I ever get is concern for his precious bloody boys and nothing for me or my daughter. I feel like just running far away with my daughter and never looking back. I think if I weren't pregnant I might well be doing that and now feel trapped. I just don't know what to do. TBH we were having troubles prior to my getting pregnant due to his behaviour and temper (he is never physical but he is completely irrational). This is most definately an "oops baby" and stupidly, (and I realise just how bloody stupid I was now - OWT, chinese gender chart, urine test etc) I convinced myself it was a girl. I'm not getting any younger and thought that having a baby girl would balance out our family and solve the problems that we have due to having 3 kids but none together.
Anyone been through similar issues with DH, step-kids etc and how did you get through them?