help

Hi i am new to this site and need some advice.  I have 5 children, 4 girls and a boy, quite alot i know. However, i do not feel complete at all and would like another baby in a few years.  My husband says that he does not want any more children as he feels at his limit.  I just can't stop thinking about having another baby.  I know that financially and emotionally we should not go for any more kids but i just can't put it out of my mind.  It is know starting to come between us. Please need some advice from any one in the same boat.  Also, getting a lot of comments from others which is upsetting me. They say i should be grateful for what i have.

It's so hard I think for so many to close this chapter in our lives.  I have 3 daughters and am on the fence about another but since I cannot afford antoher, I will not have one.  DH will get a V in Jan.  I just dont think it would be fair to the ones I have now to have a fourth.  It would take so much away from them.  When I think of that, it makes me feel better and I dont get that tugging for antoehr as much.  As mothers, we are more emotional and the daddy's can look at this situation in a more intellectual, rational way.  They werent the ones feeling that baby inside of them.  How I hated to give birth to this one b/c I knew I wouldnt have that feeling ever again.  We have alot of reasons to want to have more babies but as I said for me, I have to say no more for the sake of my family.

good luck to you!!!!

 Since you are talking about a few years off, let yourself get used to the idea that you are not going to have more.  Maybe involve yourself more in activities with school or take on a new hobby.  It is hard when your family size isn't what you expected but you have to make the best of it.  Good luck!

First let me say I'm sorry you're going through this with your DH, and also sorry there's no source of sympathy or understanding for you in real life. People can be really hurtful when they think they're "just trying to help" with their comments about "getting over it" and "being grateful." I'm also where you are with DH, and it's so bitter painful and scary...but we only have 4 (all girls). Now let me confess I'm tearfully jealous you got your boy.