Just been for scan and need advice

Hi Everyone, I have 3 boys already and 16 weeks pregnant with 4th baby. We have been for a gender scan with babybond but instead of them telling us the gender they have written it in a sealed envelope so still have no idea. Feel almost as if when I open the envelope and see the inevitable which I fully expect to be a 4th boy it will be like all hope of having a girl will have gone. Please can anyone advise me whether they have found it easier finding out or waiting for a surprise. I completely love my 3 boys but so scared that I wont feel the same way about 4th if that's a boy too, this is also making me feel horribly guilty as know I should be happy just to have a healthy baby. Also feel under so much pressure from everyone who knows we have been for a scan today, just need a way of dealing with everything and what to say to other people if it is another boy. Any advice really appreciated. Thank you

I'm not sure what to advise you re opening the envelope but I too had a babybond scan and had them write down gender and put some potty shots in an envelope and i hardly got back to the car before I had opened it. For 2 weeks I was devastated after finding out it was a little boy (no.4) but it did start to ease and I was pleased i knew and that I didn't keep having false hope. For me I think the false hope is worse. I am pg again and I am sure I will end up finding out again cos i know that the 20 weeks or so left of the pregnancy will all but rid me of my GD feelings. This time they are not as strong anyway, as devastatingly I lost my last DS at 24 weeks and it really put gender into perspective for me.

I think I would tell everyone that baby didn't cooperate and you are none the wiser as to gender. If you later decide to open the envelope and you want to tell people you could always say that you organised for another scan which is where you found out. If it is another boy I would just say that that was what you were hoping fo,r as it is so much easier with clothes etc and that you really weren't bothered either way. Although people might doubt whether this is the truth, what can they say, "what a liar??"....I don't think so.

 I so hope you get your little and do update us if you decide to open the envelope

xx

hi there.with my 2nd pregnancy (3rd baby) i got them to write it down for me as i wasnt sure if i should find out or not. i decided to open it as realised not knowing would have me get my hopes up and felt it would be easier to get used to the idea now rather than when baby was born. it said boy so my 3rd son. i was upset for couple of days but soon after doing some blue shopping and feeling his kicks get stronger i realised i loved him no matter. with this baby i was very unsure what to do as baby was unexpected and i was extremely scared of hearing boy, after asking advice on this forum i decided to find out and had the wonderful surprise to find out she is a girl. i dont regret asking now as i think not knowing would have made me more stressed during the pregnancy though would have been lovely to see girly parts when she is born. i have been very lucky to be expecting a girl this time, but in your position i would look rather than stress, worry and be dissapointed when baby is born. good luck and hope you hear girl. and of course hope you have a healthy non eventful pregnancy with a gorgeous baby at the end of it all xx

Thank you for your replies they really helped!! I have opened the envelope and it IS a 4th baby boy!! It was actually not as bad as I was expecting, I had a little cry in private but now just focussing on the positives. Still would dearly love a daughter one day but for now will just concentrate on this little man and may look into High Tech methods for a girl in the future, I am 33 so have a few years of breeding time left in me! Think it has helped just thinking that it doesn't have to be my last baby, so not last chance for daughter and can look forward to this son as an individual instead of wishing he was a girl. My next four babies WILL be all girls lol! Thanks again for taking the trouble to reply. Wishing you both healthy and happy pregnancies with lovely healthy babies at the end! xxx

Thank you!! Sorry for the loss of your baby must have been totally devastating, two of my close friends just lost babies at 21 wks and 24 wks and your right it does put things into perspective. I completely agree to your approach for telling people too, I wouldnt for a second want anyone to think I was any less than thrilled with another baby boy so I will be telling people that I actually quite wanted another boy. Best of luck for your pregnancy too. Thanks again. xxx

just wanted to say congrats on your 4th boy xx

Mud Slugs and Worms:

Thank you!! Sorry for the loss of your baby must have been totally devastating, two of my close friends just lost babies at 21 wks and 24 wks and your right it does put things into perspective. I completely agree to your approach for telling people too, I wouldnt for a second want anyone to think I was any less than thrilled with another baby boy so I will be telling people that I actually quite wanted another boy. Best of luck for your pregnancy too. Thanks again. xxx

 

I think you're handling it brilliantly and congratulations on your new gorgeous little man...just laugh and tell people you are going for a five-a-side team and that you'll definitely be having more for that reason alone..then watch their faces, it's priceless!! You sound like such a lovely mum and your boys are VERY lucky to have you. I'm sure a is in your future...if not lots of 's.

xx