Sometime back in August I came up with this crazy idea to do Microsorting. I had a tubal ligation after the birth of my 5th son, so I knew that I needed to do IVF in order to get pregnant. I have NO idea how the hell I ended getting my dh to consent to all of this madness, but I did,and there my journey began. Soon after deciding to do IVF/MS, I found ingender. I read about Lucy's IVF/PGD success and changed my mind about doing MS. I thought that PGD would be a better alternative. Dh and I drove to Dallas ( 3 hrs. away) to complete some blood work and I had a mock transfer. All went well and I was on my way. I was so excited and VERY naive about what I was about to go through. I was still nursing my ds and was told that I needed to wean him. This was probably the hardest part about the whole thing. He was only 15 months old and I intended on nursing him until he was two. I continued to nurse him until I started my meds and then I stopped cold turkey. It really wasn't that hard for him, but I couldn't help but feel an incredible amount of guilt. I had so much fun shopping for little girl clothes ( there was a good sale at the Gymboree and I couldn't help it). I would pull out the clothes every few days and line it up on my bed. I even went as far as to dress my poor ds in the clothes 
. He was a good sport,and didn't seem to mind. I started stims on October 23rd. It felt so cool to feel my ovaries working. It felt like little pop rocks or something. I had my first check after starting stims on October 30th ( 7 days after starting stims). My RE did an ultrasound and decided that I was ready to trigger. I had 15 or so follicles and my uterus linning was perfect. I immediately started bawling because I knew that this was it. If this didn't work then my dream was over. That night, about an hour before I was supposed to trigger, I took a good look at the needle and thought there is no f&cking way that dh is going to stick this needle in my ass.I even called the nurse that was on call JUST to make sure that this was the right sized needle. It was, but amazingly it didn't even hurt. The next day was Halloween and we had to do the trick or treating with the kids before we could head up to Dallas. Of course our 1 year old developed a fever, so we had to take him with us. We had such a hard time getting him to go to sleep,but he finally crashed at about 2:00 a.m! The next morning I got up bright and early. I was filled with excitement and anticipation. The ER went well and they were able to get 11 eggs. All of the eggs fertilized. I then started to get real worried about not getting any female embyos. I'm not sure why, but I just had this gut feeling that there wouldn't be any female embryos.I was scheduled to have my ET at 2:00 pm,but I told my RE that I wouldn't start heading up to Dallas until I knew for sure that there was going to be a transfer. I didn't want to drive 3 hours alone if the news was bad. I was on the phone with Tina ( from ingender) when my RE called to tell me that there weren't any healthy female embryos to transfer. I thought that I was going to die! My dream was over 
.I never cried so hard in my life. To be continued....